How did we survive?
October 15th, 2008Tonight, I was browsing through my notebook. The one that I used when Maddie was a newborn to keep track of her feedings, mostly. The one that I used to jot down fleeting thoughts and diaper information. I’m glad that I kept this notebook, and it really puts things in perspective, especially on a night like tonight! We had a rough time getting her to bed tonight, but nothing compares to the first few weeks. Everyone said it would be hard. Everyone said that we wouldn’t get any sleep. But nobody told us what life would be like with a colicky baby who refuses to sleep. Everyone mentioned the constant feedings, but it just didn’t register until it was time to do it. I think there’s no way to get it until you have the baby. And every baby is different, of course, so nobody can tell you what it is going to be like for you. I knew it was going to be hard, yet it was 100 times harder than anything I imagined. I had encountered sleep deprivation in the past, but I never experienced sleep deprivation for so many consecutive days. And pregnancy emotions are nothing compared to postpartum emotions, yikes! I had a few breakdowns in the early months.
To give you an idea of what I mean when I say that the baby demands constant feeding in the early days, I nursed Maddie a total of 19 times on February 25th – Maddie’s 4th full day. The total amount of time spent nursing was almost 7 hours. 7 hours! That time represents the amount of time that Maddie was actually latched on and does not take into account getting prepared or convincing her to latch or trying to get her awake enough to feed. It doesn’t take into account the diaper changes, which we had to do pretty much at every feeding and then some. Exhausting does not even begin to describe it.
So how did we survive? It had a little something to do with this little angel (this photo taken a few days after bringing her home – she’s so tiny!). Just one look at her, and suddenly it was all worth it.
October 15th, 2008 at 8:43 pm
OMG… look at how teeny she was! That’s such a sweet pic!
October 16th, 2008 at 6:36 am
Amazing, isn’t it? And with my now 5 and 10 year old, who can stress me out to no end, I just look at them and say “I wouldn’t have it any other way. They make my life so worth it. I wouldn’t survive without them.”
Great, great post.